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You know you are a runner when:

- You finish the race looking like you wrestled a bear and you don't care.

- You combine phrases like "10 mile run" and "Easy run" in the same breath.

- You can sharpen an axe blade on your calves.

- Find humour in an other's running form.

- Watching a Marathon on T.V. made you get up and go for a run.

- You can hallucinate and get high at the same time without taking anything.

- You wash your shorts in the shower.

- Every road you drive on you think what a great hill session this would be.

-You look at Paul Tergat and Daniel Komen, both who look like famine victims, and you think "Damn! I wish that I could have a body like that!"

- You consider a 15 mile run a good cure for a hangover

- You scare the **** out of people when you pass them because they couldn't hear you coming.

- You finish a hard track workout with a killer headache and you say "That was great".

- You almost wish that a pickpocket would grab your wallet so that you could chase him down.

- You know just how far a "k" is.

- A car horn makes your middle finger rise into the air by reflex.

- You eat 4000 calories a day and still lose weight.

- Your relatives and co-workers think you are crazy.

- You waste ridiculous amounts of time engaged in meaningless arguments and discussions about running.

- When a non-runner asks you if you "jog" you have to fight the urge to punch them in the face

- Your nipples have ever bled.

- Chafing is a serious medical condition.

- You can't imagine not running.

- You get asked by strangers why you are "running with extra shoes" when you are carrying your flats to a workout.

- The first question anybody asks you once they find out you are a runner is "Have you ever run the marathon?" and even if you explain that you are a miler or 5k runner - then they immediately lose interest in the conversation.

- You have pissed in public more often then your dog.

- You get the urge to kill when you hear "Run Forest run".

- You understand that XC and Track are actually contact sports.

- You feel proud when someone says "You're so thin".

- You've wallpapered an entire room in race numbers.

- You get a kick out of passing cyclists.

- You stay up 3 hrs past your normal bedtime to catch a 3 minute race.

- You use Vaseline on your bits that rub.

- You've started a ten miler thinking "I'm gonna take it easy today" only to find yourself sprinting at the end to break 80 minutes.

- You wake up every morning in pain.

- You have running withdrawl if you don't run everyday.

- You're running in your dreams.

- You drink more water than Free Willy.

- Your calves are bigger than your biceps.

- Talking about the colour of your urine comes as natural as talking about the weather.

- You take the splits of little old ladies jogging around the track "just in case".

- When it comes to figuring out split times and pace, you are a regular Rain Man...

- You have an idol whom you have been to school more than they have.

- You continue running even when your nose starts bleeding.

- If you've been introduced to another "serious runner", after a two-minute background check (best event, PR, date and race where PR was set) you know if they are legit, or full of ****, because you are a walking database of running statistics.

....feel free to add more...

Mick Rice

15 years 12 months ago

- You have one pair of normal shoes for interviews and weddings but also possess, three pairs of training shoes, a pair of flats, two pairs of spikes (track and cross-country), trail shoes (worn once) and a couple of pairs of lighweight trainers for marathons......and of course you know in your heart you could probably live without the normal shoes.

iainshaw

15 years 12 months ago

Singlet and shorts are first thing into the holiday suitcase - just in case ....

iainshaw

15 years 12 months ago

You learn pace tables like kids learn times tables

iainshaw

15 years 12 months ago

...you have heard of an IT band, and more importantly you know where it is !!!

tjb

15 years 12 months ago

........the first thing you do on a foreign holiday is look for a good training route.

tjb

15 years 12 months ago

........you know that "pronation" does not mean the opposite of "anti Irish"

JohnMS

15 years 12 months ago

......you can recognize the "real runners" from the footballers when doing your regular run by doing laps of a playing field.Footballers believe 5 laps is a long run.

Anonymous

15 years 11 months ago

your shoes have more miles than your car